Tuesday, August 19, 2008

The departed.. ( I know I know.. with all due respects to copyrights)

To give a heads up on this post:
I started writing this a year ago.. I could not finish it for various reasons. It does not hold much relevance to this point in time. I am not even sure of whether it will hold a semblance of meaning to anyone who reads it. Not a very coherent piece of work. But a collection of personal thoughts!!
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Losing a loved one has never been easy. And if it were that we lose them in succession, the loss and the vaccum is geometrically multiplied. There are no right or wrong answers really. The few days, stretch to weeks and months, after are pass in relative oblivion. So many people moving in and out of our lives, days spent on rituals and ceremonies to which you have little or no reference points or understanding. You are moving on in a blur. Quarrels are forgotten, family fueds reconciled, in some cases rekindled within a matter of days of the departure. Random thoughts start hittting you. Life after death is the buzz phrase. It's amazing to see how the family reacts. A myriad of emotions come the fore. Most of them are an expression of dwelling excessively on past failures. Caught in this web of normal human tendencies, you let the wave hit you. You ride with it in the hope that you will get ashore safe. We all learn to move on. The process sets in at a different pace for everyone. You need to begin where one feels there isn't one. No Motherhood statements are going to help. It's what I call an exrecise in self nourishment and cleansing. It lends perspective to your life. It helps you break the glass ceiling and reach out. It teaches you the most important lessons of your life if you are willing to.